I see your true color shining through...
ahh... such a nice song..
pity that song reminds me of something else now
Friday, August 21, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
It's been a while...
It's been a while since I visited my own blog! I was just looking through photo albums of friends on facebook and I realize one thing, I had a great time last year, got to know many friends.... became really close ones and tighter than ever.
People may have thought that we are an exclusive bunch, but we stayed in the same house and naturally we stuck to each other :)
Things however have changed this year... nasty glances thrown around the room... nasty comments made in the absence of another party...etc etc. Being trapped between two opposing parties is just... not fun at all.
Seeing friendship that appeared strong crumbling into nothingness saddens me... it also sends chills down my spine. How can people be so cruel? How can people be so superficial and not forgiving? People do wrong things but everyone deserves a second chance. Isn't constantly holding grudges against others detrimental even to your own mental health?
I guess all these are part of life
People may have thought that we are an exclusive bunch, but we stayed in the same house and naturally we stuck to each other :)
Things however have changed this year... nasty glances thrown around the room... nasty comments made in the absence of another party...etc etc. Being trapped between two opposing parties is just... not fun at all.
Seeing friendship that appeared strong crumbling into nothingness saddens me... it also sends chills down my spine. How can people be so cruel? How can people be so superficial and not forgiving? People do wrong things but everyone deserves a second chance. Isn't constantly holding grudges against others detrimental even to your own mental health?
I guess all these are part of life
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Life update?!
Truthfully I tried posting an entry... but too many thoughts are flodding my mind at the moment and it's just too hard for me to put in words... english is my second language... that's it guys. I shall try harder next time when I do not lack motivation and when I'm not feeling malaised :)
Monday, December 29, 2008
Life in Kota Kinabalu
It's been a month since I'm back in KK,Sabah, Land below the wind :) It is still serene as usual. The instant the plane touched down in Kuala Lumpur International Airport, there was a certain feeling that I can't really explain. I think it was a mixture of emotions including happiness, nostalgia, hesitation, and a little bit of sadness.
Happy because I was going to see my parents and sister very soon. Nostalgia because I haven't been to Kuala Lumpur for 2 years, hesitation arose wondering if I would actually enjoy this vacation, sadness because of the people I left behind in Melbourne.
This feeling occurs nevertheless even though a month has passed :( I have to say though the intensity of this interesting combination of feeling has significantly reduced since Evelyn and Andrew returned from Melbourne to KK. Why you might ask? Because we spend the whole day roaming around KK, looking for delicacies only found in KK to devour :D We also drafted a rough itinerary for our trip to KL. Again it's gonna be a food tour. By the end of the trip I will be able to convert this into a food blog :S But of course I wouldn't wanna do that as maintaining a food blog is sooo tiring and I always finish eating my food before snapping a shot of the food :p
Anyway, can't wait to be back in Melbourne in less than a month's time :) Will catch all of you when i return!!! Beware :)
Jonathan
Happy because I was going to see my parents and sister very soon. Nostalgia because I haven't been to Kuala Lumpur for 2 years, hesitation arose wondering if I would actually enjoy this vacation, sadness because of the people I left behind in Melbourne.
This feeling occurs nevertheless even though a month has passed :( I have to say though the intensity of this interesting combination of feeling has significantly reduced since Evelyn and Andrew returned from Melbourne to KK. Why you might ask? Because we spend the whole day roaming around KK, looking for delicacies only found in KK to devour :D We also drafted a rough itinerary for our trip to KL. Again it's gonna be a food tour. By the end of the trip I will be able to convert this into a food blog :S But of course I wouldn't wanna do that as maintaining a food blog is sooo tiring and I always finish eating my food before snapping a shot of the food :p
Anyway, can't wait to be back in Melbourne in less than a month's time :) Will catch all of you when i return!!! Beware :)
Jonathan
Monday, October 20, 2008
Stressed anyone?
It's exactly a month away from the finals... and people reading this post would be wondering WHAT THE HELL am I doing posting on my blog
A) this late at night
B) instead of studying the crap out of myself
C) instead of sleeping
Simple! I'm stressed out. I've never been so freaking stressed out in my whole life. My whole life's been easy and this is just a little... too much? Although I must say despite being stressed out to the max, I am gaining satisfaction from my studying as I am gaining a lot of medical knowledge which is interesting and useful in the future. However there is simply toooo much to shove in that poor little brain of mine!
This is the first time in my whole life I've given more than.. let's say 70% of my effort. I'm saying it's 70% cos I've been working minimally for my WHOLE LIFE. I could work much more than this but then I'd go crazy and it'd be social suicide. I haven't been seeing some of my friends for the longest of time... Hope they don't forget me
Anyway, enough ranting and it's time to go to sleep....
Sleep sleep sleep...
A) this late at night
B) instead of studying the crap out of myself
C) instead of sleeping
Simple! I'm stressed out. I've never been so freaking stressed out in my whole life. My whole life's been easy and this is just a little... too much? Although I must say despite being stressed out to the max, I am gaining satisfaction from my studying as I am gaining a lot of medical knowledge which is interesting and useful in the future. However there is simply toooo much to shove in that poor little brain of mine!
This is the first time in my whole life I've given more than.. let's say 70% of my effort. I'm saying it's 70% cos I've been working minimally for my WHOLE LIFE. I could work much more than this but then I'd go crazy and it'd be social suicide. I haven't been seeing some of my friends for the longest of time... Hope they don't forget me
Anyway, enough ranting and it's time to go to sleep....
Sleep sleep sleep...
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Agony
Agony,
sitting here doing assignments screams agony
what can give rise to more misery?
oh assignments oh assignments it is thee
so what is to be or not to be?
The word limit of 2000 cries utter impossibility,
Yet here I sit feeling all fidgety,
giving my best in ending this blasphemy,
Relentlessly I pray to the great Almighty:
O wondrous mother of all agony,
rest thy cruelty,
and grant me inner harmony...
However, it remains part of reality,
CBPP report should be condemned to BURN for all of eternity!
sitting here doing assignments screams agony
what can give rise to more misery?
oh assignments oh assignments it is thee
so what is to be or not to be?
The word limit of 2000 cries utter impossibility,
Yet here I sit feeling all fidgety,
giving my best in ending this blasphemy,
Relentlessly I pray to the great Almighty:
O wondrous mother of all agony,
rest thy cruelty,
and grant me inner harmony...
However, it remains part of reality,
CBPP report should be condemned to BURN for all of eternity!
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Happy Birthday!
I guess this is a little belated but I'll say it anyway... Happy 22nd birthday Victoria Chang!
That's a really pretty picture of you Vicky, so I decided to share it with the rest of the small population that reads my blog :D
don't kill me!!
That's a really pretty picture of you Vicky, so I decided to share it with the rest of the small population that reads my blog :D
don't kill me!!
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Aged Care Facilities
In order to produce competent medical students (Like Gippsland Medical Students), the university has arranged us to have 3-day placements in aged care/nursing homes. Today was the first time in my life that I have stepped into a proper aged care home or what we would call 'lao ren yuan' in Malaysia. What welcomed us was a faint, weird scent probably given out by product of incontinence (or at least I think it is)?? Anyway, I was always a bit apprehensive about interacting with elderly.
I used to have a Grandmother whom I loved dearly, however, caring for her is another matter. Mobility and Cognition wise she was fully capable, she attention she seeks on the other hand is all another topic. There was a period of time when she stayed over at my parent's house, and every morning, she would come knocking on my door. I remember it vividly as I was having my holidays and I would stay up late (as normal young lads would!) and wake up late too. So morning call at 7.00am every single morning. She would engage me (forcibly) in some conversation regarding some distant relatives who I do not know AT ALL for ages and I would just nod my head and try to appear attentive. I could not bring myself to push her away. Furthermore and so on and so forth....
Moving on to my placements, so given that, I am not confident at all in dealing with elderly people. Especially those who are put in nursing home for they have lost their independence and have to rely on nurses/personal carers for simple daily activities such as cleaning themselves, wearing clothes, continence or incontinence you'd still have to take care of them, most of the elderly people there suffer from dementia to some degree.
I came across an old lady, who could not move out her bed without assistance anymore. She was a frail, old lady. She had hardly any flesh left on her bony body. He cheeks were sunken and pale, she could not speak properly and it was really hard for me to understand what she was trying to say even though I was trying really hard to. In times like this, it might be best to just leave and ignore? Do what is needed and let her be?
Every time the nurse and I turned her around to her side, she would moan and sigh. She held tightly to my arms with her stick thin fingers when the nurse was giving her a bed wash (meaning they clean her body without having her leave the bed, the hold was weak, yet firm. I automatically put my hand over hers and smiled sadly. Thoughts were flooding my mind at that instant... Why is that people have to suffer when they're at such a frail age? The nurse educator told me 5% of the community ends up in Aged Care. Would I, one day end up like this? bedridden? Not being able to move as I desire and restricted to moving around in my wheelchair? Not being able to recognize my families, friends and my loved ones? If I were in their shoes, would I rather die or live on demented and deranged? I cannot give an answer to that at this point in time, but I do hope that I get an answer to that question at some point in my life.
Being in aged care requires a lot of physical strength, patience and compassion. I salute the nurses and personal carers working at the nursing home and aged care for what they have to encounter on a daily basis for I, myself would not be able to handle that.
I am looking forward to my next placement there in another fortnight. Hopefully I would be able to make the fullest of my aged care placement.
I used to have a Grandmother whom I loved dearly, however, caring for her is another matter. Mobility and Cognition wise she was fully capable, she attention she seeks on the other hand is all another topic. There was a period of time when she stayed over at my parent's house, and every morning, she would come knocking on my door. I remember it vividly as I was having my holidays and I would stay up late (as normal young lads would!) and wake up late too. So morning call at 7.00am every single morning. She would engage me (forcibly) in some conversation regarding some distant relatives who I do not know AT ALL for ages and I would just nod my head and try to appear attentive. I could not bring myself to push her away. Furthermore and so on and so forth....
Moving on to my placements, so given that, I am not confident at all in dealing with elderly people. Especially those who are put in nursing home for they have lost their independence and have to rely on nurses/personal carers for simple daily activities such as cleaning themselves, wearing clothes, continence or incontinence you'd still have to take care of them, most of the elderly people there suffer from dementia to some degree.
I came across an old lady, who could not move out her bed without assistance anymore. She was a frail, old lady. She had hardly any flesh left on her bony body. He cheeks were sunken and pale, she could not speak properly and it was really hard for me to understand what she was trying to say even though I was trying really hard to. In times like this, it might be best to just leave and ignore? Do what is needed and let her be?
Every time the nurse and I turned her around to her side, she would moan and sigh. She held tightly to my arms with her stick thin fingers when the nurse was giving her a bed wash (meaning they clean her body without having her leave the bed, the hold was weak, yet firm. I automatically put my hand over hers and smiled sadly. Thoughts were flooding my mind at that instant... Why is that people have to suffer when they're at such a frail age? The nurse educator told me 5% of the community ends up in Aged Care. Would I, one day end up like this? bedridden? Not being able to move as I desire and restricted to moving around in my wheelchair? Not being able to recognize my families, friends and my loved ones? If I were in their shoes, would I rather die or live on demented and deranged? I cannot give an answer to that at this point in time, but I do hope that I get an answer to that question at some point in my life.
Being in aged care requires a lot of physical strength, patience and compassion. I salute the nurses and personal carers working at the nursing home and aged care for what they have to encounter on a daily basis for I, myself would not be able to handle that.
I am looking forward to my next placement there in another fortnight. Hopefully I would be able to make the fullest of my aged care placement.
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